let heart speaks .

i called mak just now

but she didnt pick up the phone

i call again 

at last I gives up

serioulsy, this time i need her support
at least her voice

i need her hugs ; for sure

i really damn need it

sometimes . . . . . .

she text me just now

the person i hate most

but third person i loved in my life

my sister.

she change. 

that what she told me

perhaps its true

perhaps it just a beutiful lie

but i never give up on her

all the things i want is

to see happiness in her life.

that's it.

................

sometimes, i feel that life so empty 

i got no direction 

i hold to the path that i choose

but i became a person with heartless

i felt that i'm not fix with all this

regret.

the most bastard word that i hate

but it always in myself.

it really hurt .

really hurt when you stuck on something.

either 

left or right

up or down

you cannot move

so you just stay there

and stand in the damn crowded

it makes me drowned

and so pathetic.

suddenly i felt all stress

comes and bite me now

study 

family

friend

who a good-acting and gain my trust.

fuck to all this things around me

i cannot hold down anymore

i just cant.

may Allah always bless my life.

easy to say dear 

but, no worries.

things will change isnt'it?

now or soon.

who knows.